Compatibility

It was slightly weird to go back to St. George and walk around, seeing so much that has changed and so much that has stayed the same. My family has been away for a long time, mostly because we couldn't stand the previous priest who was there. But now, the new guy, Father Mike, is there and he seems to be much more welcoming and good natured. He's the sort of clergy you wish every clergy would be more like, upbeat and non-judgmental and really interested in helping people with thier spiritual path than making sure you're toeing the line. He didn't even give us hell about the fact that we live together, even though he didn't go so far as to condone it. Maybe it's because we are an older couple, me being 32 and Russell being 41. We're pretty much where we're going to be in our careers and life outlook, and we've had more life experience than the average young 20's something kid marrying thier high school sweetheart.

We were going for our pre-wedding consultation, where the priest assesses the couple's readiness to get married. First they have to make sure it isn't shotgun, because the Catholic church takes marriage as a lifelong thing, so they won't perform the ceremony if they think you're doing this against your will or if you're not ready for it.

We had to take an online compatibility test and meet back with Father Mike to discuss our results. It was pretty extensive, like 100 questions. I'm amazed when I tell people we had to do this and they are suprised. "Wow you had to do all that!?"

My response: "You DIDN'T?"

Personally I think it's a damn good idea to take a professional personality/compatibility test and discuss it with a spiritual counselor. It's always a good idea to have an unbiased objective outside opinion overlook somethign like this so they can be sure to point out something you might be missing or in denial about the other person, like the fact that if he doesn't respect you now, he likely won't 30 years from now. What me and Russell found out was that we are quite compatible but need to talk more about fiances and spiritual matters, which have since started doing.

At any rate, we passed the compatibility test, and Father Mike really didn't have much to say, which, he pointed out, was a good thing. Fewer issues means fewer difficulties. He emphasized communication above all things, which we seem to have a really good grasp of. Of course, I agree, since lately I have seen one too many of my friends' relationships hit major snags that could have been resolved with a good honest dose of communication.

On to the next phase: scheduling Pre-Cana seminar.